Halachah · Modern

A Lifetime Companion to the Laws of Jewish Family Life, Part One; The Study Guide, Chapter 5; Expectation of Being Niddah/מדריך להלכות טהרת המשפחה·חלק א·פרק ה

1Times of separation (onot prishah) ¹

בוְהִזַּרְתֶּם אֶת בְּנֵי יִשְׂרָאֵל מִטֻּמְאָתָם.. (ויקרא טו:לא)

2You shall separate the children of Israel from their ritual impurity…

3In order to minimize the risk that menstruation could begin during intercourse, relations are forbidden at the time a woman expects her menses. This practice is tied to the above cited verse, which indicates the need to distance oneself from the possibility of ritual impurity.

4The time of a woman’s expected menses is known as her veset (also known as onot prishah, times of separation). There are two basic categories of veset: those that depend on the date – veset hayamim, and those that depend on bodily sensations – veset haguf. During a veset, intercourse is forbidden but other forms of physical affection are allowed.²

5Veset hayamim

6בִּשְׁעַת וֶסְתָּהּ, צָרִיךְ לִפְרוֹשׁ מִמֶּנָהּ עוֹנָה אַחַת – וְלֹא מִשְּׁאָר קְרִיבוֹת אֶלָּא מִתַּשְׁמִישׁ (הַמִּטָּה) בִּלְבָד. אִם הוּא בַּיוֹם, פּוֹרֵשׁ מִמֶּנָהּ אוֹתוֹ הַיּוֹם כּוּלּוֹ אֲפִילּוּ אִם הַוֶּסֶת בְּסוֹפוֹ, וּמוּתָּר מִיָּד בַּלַּיְלָה שֶׁלְּאַחֲרָיו; ְוכֵן אִם הוּא בִתְחִלָּתוֹ, פּוֹרֵשׁ כָּל הַיּוֹם וּמּוּתָּר כָּל הַלַּיְלָה שֶׁלְּפָנָיו. וְכֵן הַדִּין אִם הוּא בַּלַיְלָה, פּוֹרֵשׁ כָּל הַלַּיְלָה וּמוּתָּר בַּיּוֹם שֶׁלְּפָנָיו וּלְאַחֲרָיו, בֵּין שֶׁקָּבְעָה וֶסֶת בְּשָׁלֹש פְּעָמִים אוֹ בְפַעַם אַחַת. (שולחן ערוך; יורה דעה, קפד:ב)

7A veset hayamim is based on the calendar date of a woman’s previous menstrual cycle. It is observed for one onah – either daytime (sunrise to sunset) or nighttime (sunset to sunrise) – corresponding to the onset of her most recent menses.

8There are three basic times when most women have to anticipate their menses, based on the time they began to have uterine bleeding the previous cycle:

91. The same Hebrew date one month later

102. The interval between the last two times

יא

113. The thirtieth day since the last time.

יב

121. The same Hebrew date: וֶסֶת הַחוֹדֶש

יגבְּרְאִיַּת הַיָּמִים, שֶׁהִיא לְיָמִים יְדוּעִים לַחֹדֶש, מִיָּד אַחַר שֶׁרָאֲתָה פַעַם אַחַת לְיוֹם יָדוּעַ לַחֹדֶש, כְּגוֹן כ"א אוֹ כ"ה בּוֹ, חוֹשֶׁשֶׁת לְפַעַם אֲחֶרֶת לְזֶה הַיּוֹם, וַאֲסוּרָה לְשַׁמֵּשׁ כָּל אוֹתָהּ הָעוֹנָה. (שולחן ערוך; יורה דעה, קפט:ב)

יד

14This is the same day of the Hebrew month (chodesh) and during the same onah (as defined above) as she began bleeding the previous month. For example, if her most recent menses began during the daytime of the 21st of Tishrei, she refrains from relations during the daytime on the 21st of Cheshvan.³) and there are only 29 days in the next month, there is a dispute among halachic authorities. By most opinions, she would anticipate the first day (which is also Rosh Chodesh) of the following month. According to other opinions she does not keep a Hebrew date at all for that month.

טו

152. The same interval: וֶסֶת הַפְלָגָה

טזמִיָּד אַחַר שֶׁרָאֲתָה פַעַם אַחַת לְסוֹף עֶשְׂרִים חוֹשֶׁשֶׁת מִכָּאן וְאֵילַךְ כְּשֶׁיַּגִּיעַ עֶשְׂרִים. (שולחן ערוך; יורה דעה, קפט:ב)

יז

17This is the interval (haflagah) between the last two times that she began her period. The day of onset of menses is counted both as the last day of the previous interval and the first day of the next interval. For example, she began her menses on the 25th of Tevet, and then again 26 days later on the 21st of Shvat. Counting the 21st of Shvat as day one of the next interval, her veset occurs 26 days later on the 16th of Adar.⁴ (Lubavitch) count the interval from the last day of bleeding to the first day of the next menses.

יח

183. The thirtieth day: עוֹנָה בֵינוֹנִית⁵.

יטכָּל אִשָּׁה שֶׁאֵין לָהּ וֶסֶת קָבוּעַ, חוֹשֶׁשֶׁת לְיוֹם שְׁלוֹשִׁים לִרְאִיָּיתָהּ שֶׁהוּא עוֹנָה בֵינוֹנִית לִסְתָם נָשִׁים. (שולחן ערוך; יורה דעה, קפט:א)

20The “average” woman (the beinonit) is assumed to have intervals between periods of thirty days, calculated as described above. All women who have not established a permanent veset on a different day (as will be discussed below) halachically assume that they are like the average woman, and regard the thirtieth day as a time of anticipated menses.

כאוְעוֹנָה בֵינוֹנִית, שֶׁהִיא לִשְׁלוֹשִׁים יוֹם, דִּינָהּ כְּוֶסֶת קָבוּעַ. (שולחן ערוך; יורה דעה, קפט:ד)

כב

22Because this day is based on what is normal for “the general public” and not only for the particular woman, it has more stringent requirements in that she must do an internal exam during this onah to check whether in fact she began her menses; if she forgot to do an internal examination, she is not permitted to resume relations with her husband until she does so.⁶separate only during the daytime or nighttime onah on other veset days, but observe a full 24-hour period of separation, from sunset to sunset, on the onah beinonit. This is in contradistinction to another custom, that of the onah of the Or Zarua. In that custom, an additional onah of separation is added BEFORE each veset. However, if a woman forgot the internal examination on the Hebrew date or after the interval, she is not required to do one afterwards.

כג

23Thus, a woman who has no established pattern has to anticipate her period on three dates: the Hebrew date, the interval and the thirtieth day. At these times she should do at least one internal exam.⁷ is for one exam at some time during the anticipated onah. The Chazon Ish, 184:22, mentions two exams, one at the beginning and one at the end of the onah. Sheuri Shevet Halevi (184:9[4]) recommends three exams – at the beginning, middle and end of the onah. Even he agrees, however, that if the exams are painful one bedikah at the end of the onah is sufficient. However, if a woman forgot the internal examination on the Hebrew date or after the interval, she is not required to do one afterwards. Often the Hebrew date and the onah beinonit coincide, in which case she observes only two onot prishah. This happens whenever the Hebrew lunar month is only 29 days long.

כד

24Sample calculations

כה

25*Note: The following calendars are read from right to left.

כו

26Tevet

כז

כח

28She bled on each day marked with a #, beginning on the 4th of Tevet at 10:00 am (the daytime onah), 28 days after the commencement of her menses the previous month. Her days of separation (onot prishah) for the following month, Shvat, are from sunrise to sunset on the following days:

כט

291. The 4th of Shvat (the Hebrew date) (d)

302. The 2nd of Shvat, which is the 28th day (the interval) (i)

לא

313. The 4th of Shvat, which is the 30th day (onah beinonit) (b)

לב

32Shvat

לג

לד

34Note that in this case there are only two onot prishah, as the yom hachodesh and onah beinonit overlap.

לה

35She started bleeding again on the 3rd of Shvat during the day, therefore the onat prishah of the 4th of Shvat fell during her days of niddah. Her onot prishah for the following month, Adar, are from sunrise to sunset on the following days:

לו

361. The 3rd of Adar (the Hebrew date) (d)

לז

372. The 1st of Adar (the interval – 29 days in this case)⁸ (i)

לח

383. The 2nd of Adar, which is the 30th day (onah beinonit) (b)

לט

39Adar

מא

41She started bleeding on Wednesday night after sunset, at the beginning of the 4th of Adar. In this case she kept all three onot prishah. Her days of anticipation for the following month, Nisan, are from sunset to sunrise on:

מב

421. The 4th of Nisan (the Hebrew date)

מג

432. The 5th of Nisan (the interval – 32 days in this case)

מד

443. The 3rd of Nisan (the onah beinonit)

מה

45Establishing a veset kavua

מווְלֹא אָמְרוּ שֶׁצָּרִיך לְקוֹבְעָם שָׁלֹשׁ פְּעָמִים אֶלָּא לְעִנְיַן עֲקִירָה, שֶׁכֵּיוָן שֶׁקּוֹבַעְתּוֹ בְּשָׁלֹשׁ פְּעָמִים אֵינוֹ נֶעֱקָר בְּפָחוֹת מִשָּׁלֹשׁ פְּעָמִים, שֶׁכָּל זְמַן שֶׁלֹּא עֲקָרַתּוּ שָׁלֹשׁ פְּעָמִים צְרִיכָה לָחוּשׁ לוֹ. אֲבָל לֵיאָסֵר, אֲפִילּוּ בְּפַעַם אַחַת חוֹשֶׁשֶׁת לוֹ פַעַם שְׁנִיָּה. וּמִיהוּ אַף עַל פִּי שֶׁחוֹשֶׁשֶׁת לוֹ, נֶעֱקָר בְּפַעַם אַחַת, אֲפִילּוּ קוֹבַעְתּוֹ שְׁתֵּי פְעָמִים – שֶׁאִם רָאֲתָה שְׁנֵי יָמִים לְיוֹם יָדוּעַ, וּבַשְּׁלִישִׁית לֹא רָאֲתָה – אֵינָהּ חוֹשֶׁשֶׁת לוֹ עוֹד. (שולחן ערוך; יורה דעה, קפט:ב)

מזעוֹד יֵשׁ חִילּוּק בֵּין קוֹבַעְתּוֹ שָׁלֹשׁ פְּעָמִים לְלֹא קוֹבַעְתּוֹ שָׁלֹשׁ פְּעָמִים: שֶׁהַקָּבוּע – אַף עַל פִּי שֶׁעָבְרָה עוֹנָתָהּ וְלֹא הִרְגִּישָׁה, אֲסוּרָה לְשַׁמֵּשׁ עַד שֶׁתִּבְדּוֹק וְתִמָּצֵא טְהוֹרָה. וְשֶׁלּא קוֹבַעְתּוֹ שָׁלֹשׁ פְּעָמִים – אִם הִגִּיעַ זְמַן הַוֶּסֶת וְלֹא בָדְקָה וְלֹא רָאֲתָה, כֵּיוָן שֶׁעָבְרָה עוֹנָתָהּ, מוּתֶּרֶת. וְעוֹנָה בֵינוֹנִית, שֶׁהִיא לִשְׁלוֹשִׁים יוֹם, דִּינָהּ כְּוֶסֶת קָבוּעַ. (שולחן ערוך; יורה דעה, קפט:ד)

מח

48Most women today, even those with what would medically be considered a regular period, expect their menses only within a given time range and not on a specific day. A few women, however, are able to predict the time of their menstruation exactly. Halachically, if a woman establishes a pattern of commencing her menses on the same Hebrew date or after the same interval three times in a row during the same onah,⁹ of haflagot (intervals) with menses beginning at identical intervals from daytime to nighttime and from nighttime to daytime and so on. she has what is called a veset kavua or established veset. A veset kavua has a number of implications, both lenient and stringent.

מט

49A woman with a veset kavua anticipates bleeding only on the day of the month or at the intervals she has established. She must do an internal examination during the onah of her veset kavua. If she forgot, she must do the examination before resuming relations with her husband.

50If a woman with a veset kavua begins her menses on a day other than her veset kavua, then the following month she observes the Hebrew date and the interval from the deviant sighting, and also observes her veset kavua. She does not observe onah beinonit. If, for three consecutive cycles, she does not have bleeding on her veset kavua, the veset kavua is uprooted and she no longer anticipates it.

נא

51Even after a veset kavua has been uprooted, it remains dormant. Therefore, if she subsequently begins her menses in accordance with her former veset kavua – even one time – the veset kavua is immediately reestablished, even if years have passed since it was uprooted. Only if she she establishes a different veset kavua is her previous one permanently uprooted.

נב

52In addition to beginning to bleed on the same Hebrew date or after the same interval for three consecutive cycles, there are other ways of establishing a veset kavua; however, they are rare and rather complicated. If a woman notices any consistent pattern (such as bleeding on the same date every other month, or at gradually increasing or decreasing intervals), she should consult a rabbi to see if it meets the criteria of a one-time or an established veset. It is a good idea to keep a running list of the times and dates of menstruation (such as that provided in Appendix F, p. 212), to allow for noticing potential patterns.

נג

53Veset haguf

נדיֵשׁ קוֹבַעַת וֶסֶת עַל יְדֵי מִקְרִים שֶׁיְּאָרְעוּ בְגוּפָהּ כְּגוֹן:

נהשֶׁמְּפַהֶקֶת – דְּהַיְינוּ כְאָדָם שֶׁפּוֹשֵׁט זְרוֹעוֹתָיו מֵחֲמַת כּוֹבֶד, אוֹ כְאָדָם שֶׁפּוֹתֵחַ פִּיו מֵחֲמַת כּוֹבֶד, אוֹ שֶׁמּוֹצִיא קוֹל דֶּרֶך הַגָּרוֹן, וְכֵן אִם מִתְעַטֶּשֶׁת דֶּרֶךְ מַטָּה, אוֹ חוֹשֶׁשֶׁת בְפִי כְרֵיסָהּ וּבְשִׁיפּוּלֵי מֵעֶיהָּ, אוֹ שֶׁאֲחָזוּהָ צִירֵי הַקַּדַחַת, אוֹ שֶׁרֹאשָׁהּ וְאֵיבָרֶיהָּ כְּבֵדִים עָלֶיהָ. בְּכָל אֶחָד מֵאֵלּוּ, אִם יְאָרַע לָהּ שָׁלֹשׁ פְּעָמִים וְרָאֲתָה, קָבְעָה לָהּ וֶסֶת, שֶׁבְּכָל פַּעַם שֶׁהִיא חוֹשֶׁשֶׁת מֵהֶם, אֲסוּרָה לְשַׁמֵּשׁ. וּמִיהוּ, בְּפִיהוּק אוֹ עִיטּוּשׁ שֶׁל פַּעַם אֶחָד אֵין הַוֶּסֶת נִקְבָּע אֶלָא כְּשֶׁעוֹשָׂה כֵן הַרְבֵּה פְעָמִים זֶה אַחַר זֶה. וְאִם אֵירַע לָהּ שָׁלֹשׁ פְּעָמִים, שֶׁבְּכָל פַּעַם עָשְׂתָה כֵן הַרְבֵּה פְעָמִים, הֲרֵי זֶה וֶסֶת. וְכָל אֵלּוּ הַוְּסָתוֹת שֶׁבְּגוּפָהּ אֵין לָהֶם זְמַן יָדוּעַ, אֶלָּא בְּכָל פַּעַם שֶׁיִּקְרֶה לָהּ זֶה הַמִּקְרֶה, הוּא וֶסֶת. (שולחן ערוך; יורה דעה, קפט:יט)